Thursday, April 18, 2013

Red, Red Wine...

JV:  What do you live with Simone?
Simone: My husband likes  drinking wine out of red wine glasses. But he leaves the glasses hanging around and doesn’t wash them. We don’t have a dishwasher, so I keep telling him to wash his glass when  he’s finished but he doesn’t. So I’ve taken to every glass he doesn’t wash up, I smash it. So we now have plastic wine glasses.
JV: You smash them?
Simone: I don’t mind drinking my drink out of plastic.  I’ll drink out of a tea cup.
JV: So if he doesn’t wash it up, you smash it? 
Simone: Correct.
JV: So you have none?
Simone: Correct.
JV: So you were getting tired of this?
Simone: Quite. Because they’re very easy to knock over. When they’re round the kitchen sink.
JV:  Are you saying he should do the dishes more often, or just when he’s drunk red wine he should go over and wash his glass.
Simone: Just wash the glass.
JV: A rinse out, ready for washing?
Simone: Wash it out, dry it off, put it away.
JV: And should he do that if he has a cup of tea?
Simone: No. Because that’s not  a long stemmed glass.
JV:  Why is it that you need them washed straight away?
Simone: Because, it’s very easy to knock them over. Our kitchen is not very big. It’s a tight galley. So we now use plastic wine glasses.
JV: So it’s only the long stemmed wine glasses that you insist on being washed up.
Simone: And put away.
JV: Is your husband there?
Simone: No. He’s walked away. He said he should be ringing to complain about me smashing them.
JV: Well, I do think smashing them is a fairly extreme response. Has he gone out to buy a half dozen more.
Simone:  No he doesn’t dare.  The fact is, someone gave us some. But there in a box and we’re only using the plastic.
JV: You are sounding fairly extreme to me Simone.
Simone: When I married him fourteen years ago, I didn’t know he couldn’t cook. And he looked at me one night and said, “What are you cooking for dinner?” and I said, “David, I don’t do a cooked dinner at night and I’m not about to start now.”
JV: And this didn’t happen until after you were married?
Simone: Correct.
JV: Can I get back to the wine glasses? I just want to get this straight in my own mind. You want him to wash up the glasses because if he leaves them hanging around the kitchen, they might get broken?
Simone: Correct.
JV: But when he leaves them around unwashed, you smash them.
Simone: Correct.
JV: Doesn’t seem odd to you? You smash them so they won’t get broken?
Simone: Only way to stop him.
JV: Wow. You two have an interesting relationship.
Simone: He never leaves the toilet seat up. That’s how I knew he was the man for me.

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